10 ways to love the church you're in

Ten ways to love the church you're in 

BE YOURSELF

Are you creative and outgoing or quiet and introverted? Either way, embrace who you are. God will show you how to love people in your own unique way. Don't worry about what the last Pastor's wife or your Senior Pastor's wife is like. 


Being authentically you will keep your heart open to loving the church you are in.

FIND YOUR NICHE

You do not have to, nor should you do everything. Even if it's a small church. Just say no to things that seem to suck the life out of you. I know there's times to be sacrificial but committing to run the nursery, sing in the choir, organize the ladies luncheon and be on the missions committee is not sacrificial, it's downright insane! Pick one area that you really love. If what you love is soap making then invite college girls over to make soap! If you are an introvert then pray about that one woman who may also be an introvert whom you can connect with and be a blessing to. 

Finding your Niche is crucial to keeping your heart open to loving the church you are in. 

Pray for your Church

Yes, I mean it! Pray for the people you see every week. Pray for the children. Pray for the pastor! Pray for the music director. Pray for the tech. people. Pray for the elderly. Pray for the young families. Pray for single women. Pray for the single men. Pray they will find each other! Just pray. 

Praying for your church will fling the doors of your heart open to love the church you are in. 

Forgive Quickly

We live in a fallen world with fallen people. We mess up. They mess up. We are all a mess. Don't hold onto offenses. If you've been hurt so badly that you just don't think you can forgive, ask the Lord how he did it. How did he forgive those who mocked him, scorned him, betrayed him, spit on him, crucified him? Jesus will show you how to forgive.

Forgiving quickly guards your heart so you can love the church you are in.

Put some wise phrases in your pocket

Unexpected requests, comments and statements can catch us off guard. It's best to have some wise phrases ready just in case. Here's a few for you. 

"I'm sorry, I don't relay church messages to my husband. I'd hate to forget or not be precise. I'm sure you understand."

"Yes, everyone's children are works in progress. Mine are no exception. I'm so glad they are normal!" 

"I know you care deeply about this church. I do as well. Let's commit to praying for this issue. I'm confident God will reveal His heart to us."

Keeping wise phrases in your pocket provides a way for you to love the church you're in.

Invest in people B4 programs

Wow, this is a biggie. Programs and people seem to be intermingled. If you are working in youth ministry then you are investing in the youth. If you are singing on the worship team you are investing in the whole congregation. But that's not going to help you love your church. You need to be intentional about people. Who are you caring for? Who feels comfortable calling you by your first name, texting you for advice or dropping by for tea? If there is nobody, I'd like to suggest it's because you are program driven. If you are exhausted and unable to welcome anyone into your real space of life, it may be time to rethink what you're doing. Invite that  woman to go grocery shopping with you. Text that youth a bible verse and tell them you are praying. Create time to be with people outside of regular church programs. You may be surprised how encouraged you feel.

Investing in people B4 programs will drive you to love the church you're in. 

 

Remember to say Thank You!

I'm terrible at this one. I've just been through minor surgery and felt the outpouring of love from my church in the form of meals, cards and caring emails. My next priority after this post is to sit down and write out my thank you notes. REAL PAPER, thank you notes. 

Saying, "Thank you" will remind you to love the church you're in.

Invite people over!

Oh dear, I heard that groan from my introverted PW's. It's okay to keep it simple. Just a cup of coffee or tea and a store bought cake or tray of cookies will do. Throw them on a pretty plate of your own and all will be well! As far as conversation, let your talkative hubby lead.This is why you need to invite people over at least once a month... ...Because they want to know you.  Also, if you've shared a meal or a cookie with someone you will feel more comfortable sharing your wise phrases if needed. Who knows, you may just find you really like the people in your church. It is true! Inviting people over fills your heart to love the church you're in. 

Protect your family time

This should come as no surprise. It's a doozie!  How on earth do you protect your family time? It is different for every one but here's what we do. 

No technology on Sundays. Sundays are crazy enough without fighting over screen time. So our kids know Sunday afternoons are time to chill, play games and/or nap. 

No technology before or right after school. Again, so much is going on we just had to put a stop to the madness. Once homework is done and chores, then we allow limited screen time.

Guy time and Date night. Since we only have boys, they have weekly "guy time" with their dad. Dave takes them each out for a treat or outdoor activity.  Dave and I also have a weekly date night. Sometimes we call it a couch date when we are penny poor or bone weary, but we still send the boys off to do something so we can talk and drink coffee and catch up. 

Protecting your family time will keep your heart fresh to love the church you're in.

Stay in the Word

This should go without saying, but I'll be the first to admit my dedicated time to bible study easily slips away in the mayhem of ministry. Don't let the happen! Allowing the truth of the Word of God to permeate your heart is essential to all nine of the points above. If you are needing some accountability join one of our free bible studies here at PW101. Links below. 

Staying in the Word increases your ability to love the church you're in. 

Wow, if you stuck with me all the way through this list you are already well on your way to loving the church you are in. I pray you will put these ten things into practice. Feeling overwhelmed? Start with the one that seems easiest and do that. I am so glad you are a Pastor's Wife! Let's lean into Jesus together and work for His glory! 

Under the same wing,

-Joleen

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