The Blessing of being a Pastor's Kid!

I grew up as a pastor's kid and now I have PK's of my own.  At times, I am sorry for the label they must wear. It does seem unfair to be held to higher standard simply because of your father's job. However, most of the time, I am glad of their label. I've tried to teach my children being a PK does not need to be a burden but, a blessing. 

What blessings are there? First, let me say, I am aware of the pain and burden placed upon the pastor's family. When unfair statements are made, I help my kids address them. When people are downright rude, I defend my children. When my family is attacked by criticism, I am loyal and stand firmly on their side. But, there are ways to help the PK see himself or herself as blessed not cursed. 

Here's a few blessings:

#1. Everyone knows who you are

 

Our youngest son with his Daddy!

If I ever get lost in a major city in Canada, I will go to the nearest Free Methodist Church and say, "My father is Eldon Babcock." I believe I will be instantly welcomed and known. Perhaps this is wishful thinking. But the very fact that I've believed this all my life is a blessing. 

This did not suit me as a teenager trying to skip school for the one and only time, only to be seen by a church person who knew me immediately.  However, It only bothered me because I was doing wrong. The church person may have been a busy body, but I should not have been at the bowling alley in the middle of a Wednesday. 

The fact that everyone knows who you are means they look out for you and care for you and remember things like your birthday and the fact that you just got a new bike. People compliment you and praise you and encourage you and that brings us to the second blessing.

#2. People pray for you more often

Our three boys

I certainly hope it's true that the same dear people who pray for my kids are praying for other people's children as well. I am so grateful for those who ask, "How can I pray for your children?" Of course, I am careful not to share things that would embarrass my kids.  But, It's a joy to say,  "Oh, yes please pray for Matthew to form good deep friendships."  or, "Pray for Jonathan's safety as he travels home next week!" 

We had one dear lady who told us every Sunday that she'd prayed for our children that week. How sad we were when she went to be with Jesus. Her life of prayer impacted us and blessed us. We hope she is still daily bringing us to the throne of God as she sits at the feet of her Savior. 

#3. People gift you and your family frequently

Though we certainly do not look for or expect gifts. It's true that we are gifted frequently and often just at the right time. 

The day our eldest son was baptized, we wanted to go out for lunch to celebrate but our budget was tight so I'd planned on making his favorite foods at home. As we were leaving the church a woman walked up to me and shook my hand. It was filled with a wad of money she'd pulled from her purse. I teared up as she said, "Now you take that dear boy out for lunch and tell him, I am praying he will become a great man of God!"  What a blessing those words were and still are to my heart. 

Another time, we were in serious financial need and a check for a thousand dollars arrived in the mail! God had used us in the lives of these dear people and they felt led to share out of their abundance. Little did they know both Dave and I had been on our knees that very morning asking God to meet our needs. Praise the Lord! 

#4. There are always people in your home

our front porch on fourth of July!

I have good childhood memories of fading off to sleep to the sound of clinking glassware and quiet conversation. My parents door seemed to be open to everyone. Now, I practice the same level of hospitality as much as possible. I do everything I can to include our children in the conversations and times with people. We are careful to guard our family time and keep boundaries on our life. Yet, it's the people coming and going, praying, singing, talking and laughing that fill our home with a special atmosphere that I hope our children will remember. 

#5. Your parents lean on Christ daily and encourage you to do the same. 

My parents modeled a dependency on Christ that I in turn strive to share with my children. The ability to turn to God when we are sad, hurt or lonely is a blessing. We don't just teach our children to have a daily quiet time, we do also, spend time in bible study and prayer. We gather as a family before our youngest goes to bed each night. Dave reads a passage of scripture or asks, the kids to share what they have read. We talk and laugh and pray.  It's true there are nights we are grumpy and tired, but it is the daily encouragement that matters in the end. 

So, there you have it. Being a PK has it's blessings. 

I actually love being a Pastor's wife.  Even though we have been burned by betrayal and wounded by words, I can't think of anything I'd rather do with my life. It is this passion for Christ that I hope to impart to my darling PK's.  

How about you? Can you see past the hurts to the blessings? If not, I am sorry. I understand some seasons of ministry are dark and difficult. I am praying for you today. Praying that God would renew the joy of your salvation and heal your broken places. I pray you will be able to walk in the spirit in front of your children. I pray they will see your dependence on Christ and remember the blessings of being your child. 

-Under the same wing,

Joleen