Help my “fishbowl” is cracked!

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Post #1

Here at Pastors wife 101 we know what it means to be in ministry.  My mom and I share 70 years of ministry between us.
Though, I didn’t plan it, I married a man who later became a pastor. You can read about that in our first post, Help, my “fishbowl” is cracked! Here’s me:

 

This page is meant to encourage and lift you up. Whether you are a veteran in ministry or just starting out on the journey, we are so glad you are here. By we, I mean myself and my awesome mom, Doreen Babcock. Here’s my mom!

I hope you will join the conversation and share with us how God is speaking to you. We really want to know.
So get yourself comfy and let’s have our first chat!

Help my “fishbowl” is cracked!

By: Joleen Steel

I never wanted to be a pastor’s wife. I thought it would be the worst experience of my life.

I wanted to marry a  business man. I wanted to be secure. I wanted to sit in the pew and be known as Joleen.  Just Joleen. No tag line please.

My husband, Dave, left seminary because of me. he said, “God wouldn’t call me and not call you!”  I cried my eyes out thinking I’d interrupted God’s will for my husband. But, there is no interrupting with God. Within a year of leaving seminary I felt a clear and certain call to be Joleen, Pastor David Steel’s wife.  So, we entered into the great adventure called ministry together. 

Over the past twenty years we have weathered deep storms and climbed fantastic mountain tops. We have the typical scars and wounds that come with the territory. We also have some amazing treasures and stories filled with joy!

People say that the pastor and his family live in a fishbowl. It’s not a fishbowl, it’s more like a very large aquarium that leaks. I suppose it is true that we are observed more closely than those in the pews with no tag lines after their names. I have, however, met many a tag-less church goer with scars as deep as mine.  You do not need to live in a “fishbowl” to feel scrutinized.

I’ve never liked the fishbowl analogy. I think it’s frighteningly overstated. A fishbowl is fragile, small and confining.Besides it’s mostly boring, soon to die goldfish that live in fishbowls.  The bull whale can live to be 100 years old. But, I’d prefer not identify myself as a whale. There is one species of Jelly fish called “ Turritopsis nutricula, that reverts to a sexually immature stage after reproducing, rather than dying as in other jellyfish. Consequently the species is considered biologically immortal and has no maximum lifespan.” (Wikipedia)

Oh, I like that!  Here’s a picture of the Turritopsis nutricula. Isn’t it awesome!

But silliness aside, being in ministry need not be a terrifying ordeal. I feel quite content to be a jelly fish swimming happily in a cracked and leaky vessel, knowing that my Master will always fill it up again.  If people notice the cracks I am glad. Perhaps they will criticize and perhaps they will empathize. Regardless, I am just as my Master has made me. I am perfectly created and desperately flawed. I am loved by both my husband and my God.  I am Joleen. Not just Joleen. I am Joleen child of The King.  A fish who has been found by the great fisher of men.

I am Joleen and my “fishbowl” is blissfully cracked!  

How about you? Are you willing to accept your cracks and flaws and trust God to fill up your tank when it begins to run dry? I encourage you to read the Bible every day and spend time filling your heart with His truth. The Psalms is a great place to start. 

My mom and I would welcome the opportunity to pray for you.  Leave your comments below and we will respond as soon as we are able. After all we are all…

Under the same wing!

love Joleen